Which of the 23 values of love do you value most？

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Intimacy plays an extremely important role in most people’s lives. But even the same pursuit of love, what everyone wants from an intimate relationship is different.

So, what do you pursue in love? Last week, we collected this question from everyone and received many people’s different understandings of love. Let’s have a look. Is there the one you are looking for?

01.

Loyalty, incomparable loyalty.

I am not a person who puts such characteristics as loyalty and singleness in the first place, and I never use a certain standard to ask each other. But after two times of betrayal and deception in my feelings, I realized that loyalty is a very important standard for me, but I used to regard it as a "default" condition. However, not everyone obeys this principle by default in their feelings like me. So, I began to regard this loyalty as my first emotional standard. If you can’t do it, don’t both.

02.

I hope that I can be a listener and confidante with my lover, and share my experiences and feelings all my life. When you see fireworks and puppies, send them to each other as soon as possible or save them in a mobile phone photo album for him to see. When chatting, you spit and cry without scruple, and never hide the darkness and fragility.

03.

What I pursue in love is a unique passion and a long-flowing romance. Whether it is passionate love when I was young or companionship when I was old, the spark of love is different and gorgeous every day, and every bit of life exudes a romantic atmosphere.

04.

I’ve always longed for a close diamond cut diamond love.

My predecessor and friends around me say that I am sometimes too strong, and I admit it. My personality seems to be more suitable for a typical relationship of "women are strong and men are weak", but I am partial. I know myself. Only when the other person is really strong and confident, let me appreciate and admire from the heart and feel pressure at the same time, will I stay in this relationship with satisfaction. I wonder if I can meet such a person again?

05.

I only pursue passionate and short-lived romance and passion in love. I don’t believe in long-term love. I believe those love stories that are full of daily necessities, but I deeply doubt whether such feelings can be called love in the end.

What I want is the purest love, even if it is only for a few hours. I don’t want to last long, just love.

06.

Eager to be seen.

After many years of marriage, he never ignored my efforts and all my living habits and preferences. Is it because he is a science and engineering man?

After reading "My fragrance", I doubt whether this marriage is really worth it.

07.

As soon as I say it, you will understand. Or, you’ll understand before I tell you.

08.

I am extremely looking forward to a person who can give me justice! This fairness is for my personal feelings, not the kind of fairness that both sides come and go.

I always measure whether I am more happy or unhappy when I am in love, because I think the essence of love is also a trade-off. The accumulation of positive emotions is gain, and the accumulation of negative emotions is loss. When I lose too much, I must stop loss in time. Therefore, there will be a balance in my heart. When unhappiness is obviously more important than happiness, I will break up even if I endure the pain. After all, my happiness is the most important.

Don’t say anything like "Are you happy for each other’s happiness?". When you fall in love with your brain in the early stage, you may take pleasure in sacrificing yourself to fulfill each other, but in the long run, something will happen.

09.

What I have been pursuing is to be myself with ease and peace of mind.

10.

In love, I feel that I am eager to be loved. Maybe it’s because of family of origin that she has become very fond of her brain and is changing, because it’s really not good.

11.

Tacit understanding. Always speak in unison or say what the other person wants to say.

12.

What I pursue in love is the little happiness in plain life. I can wake up every night to tuck me in, go home from work and run into the kitchen to finish the housework I’m too lazy to do, wake up in the morning and deliberately scratch me like a kitten’s paw, and then run away. Like a child in front of me, I can go all out for my career and be my strongest backing when I am anxious. There are so many warm things at ordinary times that I can’t remember them at the moment. In short, when I think of him, I will laugh, from the heart.

13.

I hope both of us can remain sincere. Give love sincerely, express it sincerely, face yourself sincerely, and treat this feeling sincerely.

14.

What if you don’t even want to pursue love?

15.

Absolute honesty and trust. Maybe it’s too idealistic, but I want both sides to be naked and unreserved in a relationship, not mindless, but to give their backs to each other completely and enjoy the rainbow together through thick and thin.

16.

What I pursue in love is tolerance and attention.

I am a person who can’t take care of myself and has a lot of small temper. I need my partner to tolerate and accept my living habits, take care of me like my parents and make me happy. At the same time, I also need a lot of attention, and I need him to respond every time when I seek attention, and I can provide some interesting suggestions when I am bored. Although my current partner is not the same as my checklist, he is patient, tolerant and responsive. I can be happy every day and have more energy to focus on what I like.

17.

I want a friend who can talk to me and always talk to me. Passion in love is often unsustainable. Compared with lovers, it is better to be close friends who can talk about life philosophy from poetry and songs.

18.

Absolute possession, absolute freedom

Possession means that we all know clearly that "you are mine". Freedom means that we have independent space and time for each other.

19.

I always hope to find a partner who can share my views, discuss various topics and even debate with me. I am a typical "broad but not refined" person, who knows a lot and is interested in everything, but rarely stays in a pit for a long time. So I hope to find such a person, so that I can share and discuss with her at any time. It would be better if I can hold different views. I prefer to seek common ground while reserving differences, and I can respect each other while developing our ideas.

20.

I want a comfortable relationship. When I get along with each other, I don’t need too much scheming. I can say whatever I want and do whatever I want. I can be myself with confidence and boldness. The other party likes my advantages and can tolerate my minor faults, so both of them can feel comfortable and at ease in the unique magnetic field.

21.

I pursue a partner who can empathize with me and always support me.

I have a lot of thoughts in my feelings, and I am a sensitive person. Sometimes I cry easily. Even my parents sometimes can’t understand my emotions and behaviors. Therefore, I hope my future partner will be a person with strong empathy and can give me affirmation and comfort when I am sensitive and fragile.

Probably it is also a sensitive reason. Although I have a lot of ideas, I am often not confident. I gave up as soon as others persuaded me to quit. But if someone around me can give me a little affirmation, I will actually rush. I hope my partner can be such a person who will support my decision when I am not firm and let me realize my ideas more freely.

22.

That conviction and peace of mind. Even if you don’t reply to the information in time, you won’t be too worried or angry; Will share interesting news and photos in the first time; When good dishes are served, they will be fed without opening their mouths; Don’t stick together, do what you like, and come and ask for a hug from time to time … Good love should not make you anxious.

23.

Why do you have to pursue something in love? I think every relationship in my past has its own unique bright spot. The reasons why I love everyone and cherish every relationship are also different, and there is nothing I pursue in my relationship.

KY author said:

When I was a teenager, I thought about the meaning of love to people. Later, when I grew up, I found that this question had no meaning at all, because there was no fixed standard answer, only the best answer for everyone.

Just like the answer sheet of life, each has its own reasons and its own wonderful things. Quantifiable standards such as money, status and life span are not worthy of being measured.

However, the appearance of various voices and answers is not to disturb the audience, but to provide a "reference answer", a possibility of "not yet seen".

We put the answers on the table, surround and examine them, like going shopping in the mall to buy shoes, holding them over and over in our hands, and trying to put them on for two steps. I can see that it is infinitely good in the future, and I can also see the bad things that need to be endured behind the glamorous fantasy. Then I finally decided, "Well, that’s it" or "Let’s see".

In any case, the choices you make have to be borne by yourself, just like the shoes you buy are put on your feet. You may not notice whether they look good or not, but only you know whether they are comfortable or not.

I hope we can all know what we want, find what we want, and what we want is the most suitable.